A Slightly Different Family Law Blog

A quick shout out to an Indonesian family law blog - Islamic Family Law in Indonesia. Interesting to see how a completely alien legal system operates. And how some of the topics never change - money and trying to understand just what was the legislature thinking (or if it was). Yes, it is apparent that English is not the writer's first language but that makes his exposition even more impressive to me (a good deal more understandable than an Order or two that I have seen in the past month from Indiana judges).

New Blog for Child Custody, Joint Custody and Shared Custody

I ran across this blog by way of LinkedIn's American Divorce Lawyers group. Its title captures its subject: Child Custody, Joint Custody and Shared Custody.

Quite a wealth of material here, to the point of almost seeming a bit overwhelming. It is much more geared towards parents than lawyers. I think parents should bookmark this one.

Adding to What Other Indiana Family Law Blogs Are Saying

When I wrote What Other Indiana Family Law Blogs Are Saying, I overlooked Divorce Indiana Blog. My apologies for the oversight.

Some articles that interested me:

• Military divorce or separation? What are the basics that you need to know?
• Parenting Time Restriction, Reduction and Termination (which is another reminder that I ahve been remiss on my reading case law and blogging).
  

What Other Indiana Family Law Blogs Are Saying

I have been writing about many things the past few months and been writing about others are writing elsewhere but realized this past week that I have not truly noted what other Indiana family law blogs are writing about. I think all of us have a slightly different slant (I sometime call my cantankerously pedantic)  That is my mea culpa and here is what I have for you.

William Wilson of South Bend, Indiana writes Indiana Family Law.  He may have even started his blog before me and is consistent on his emphasis on collaborative family law.  Here reminded us back in October that the new child support guidelines take effect next month - Indiana Child Support Guidelines changing.  Here are some other posts very much worth reading:

• Why can’t my child decide which parent he wants to live with?
• What is it like to go to court? Looking for stories  There is a good point here for non-lawyers and lawyers in this one.  A point I may be just as guilty of anyone else - remembering that non-lawyers have no idea what court will be like. (And he is looking for comments, if you got stories  then let him know!)
• How to survive your divorce: a free ebook.  Thinking I want to see this, too.

Ryan Cassman publishes All Things Family Law - Indiana Divorce & Family Law Blog and practices with Hollingsworth & Zivitz, P.C..  He has been kind enough to point out some things on here but I still like him and his blog!  Well, enough to keep a close eye on what he is doing.  Here are some of the posts I have not noted and like:

• Joint Legal Custody - Religious Services and Parenting Time
• Retirement and Divorce - Are Paid Health Insurance Premiums An Asset? (He has been much better than I have been lately of writing up new appellate cases.
• Indiana Child Support Guidelines - High Earners Pay More, Low Earners Pay Less.  Pay attention to this one - another article about our new child support guidelines - these will be a major disruption from what I have heard and what I have been able to get read.

Down in New Albany, the firm  Waters Tyler Scott Hofmann & Doane, LLC publish DIVORCE LAW INDIANA.

• Indiana Family Law Case Update: refusal to sign joint tax return & taking kids to church during visitation.  Another reminder that I have been remiss in not reporting on new Indiana cases.
• Split custody of siblings - not a subject I have seen discussed anywhere else.
• Taking your child holiday shopping for your ex-spouse.  Again, something I have not seen written about.
  

New Divorce and Family Law Blogs

Bankruptcy and divorce, two subjects existing closer than will please many is the subject of The Interplay Between Bankruptcy and Divorce Law in Virginia. Not exactly a zinger for a blog name but spot on accurate for its content.  The posts concentrate on Viriginia, naturally.  Which does not mean it lacks value for Indiana - just check its bankruptcy reports against our Seventh Circuit.  (I do not expect many differences but what differences exists will probably be significant.)

I found interesting what differences exist between Indiana and Virginia in its Top Ten Costly Divorce Mistakes to Avoid During a Recession (as well as good points for Hoosiers, too):

1. Adultery may eliminate spousal support in Virginia.

Even if our temporary maintenance equals their spousal support, there is no support for this in our statute.  On the other hand, I think our economy and the closeness of income between parties makes maintenance (temporary or otherwise) difficult to get.  For more on Indiana maintenance go my archived articles.

2. Be aware of formulas and guidelines for determining support in Virginia: child support guidelines are the presumptively correct starting point for support; pendente lite spousal support: w/child – 28/58%, w/o child – 30/50%.

This is true for Indiana, too.  Diverting from our Child Support Guidelines means having a very good reason.

3. Alimony: request it, reserve it, or lose it.

Not got alimony in Indiana but maintenance we do have.  Request a provisional hearing and ask for temporary maintenance and save permanent maintenance for the Final Hearing.  But go back and see my comment to 1.

4. You have 2 years to file for an annulment and you may lose your right by cohabitation after knowledge of the facts.

Looks like annulment may be as hard to get in Virginia as in Indiana.  Cohabitation is also a defense in Indiana.  This did point out to me that there is no explicit statute of limitations for annulment in Indiana under the Indiana Code (and certainly none mentioned in any of the available cases).  I suppose that our general statute of limitations on fraud may apply.  For more about annulment in Indiana, follow this link to the annulment articles archive.

5. Do not delay the filing of a motion to modify support upon a material change in circumstances.

Damned good advice.  This applies everywhere.  Even when there is not a recession.  Do not say that you cannot afford a lawyer - find one that will unbundle services or one that takes payments.  Getting behind in your child support means contempt, which can mean jail.  You figure out which is cheaper - a lawyer or jail time.  For my articles on contempt, go here.  For my atricles on attorney fees go here, and for child support articles follow this link.

6. Judges are hostile to the concept of separating under the same roof in Virginia.

Never seen this problem in Indiana.  Especially locally with our post- General Motors economy, judges can have no problem with two people living together who do not want to be married any longer.

7. A suit for a divorce from bed and board can be filed immediately in the Circuit Court. You may be able to obtain pendente lite relief for temporary support, attorney’s fees and costs, protective orders, temporary custody and child support, exclusive use of the marital residence, or a freeze on assets.

Take out the "from bed and board" and add after Circuit Court "or Superior Court", and  take out "protective orders" and , and you have a good description of what Indiana courts can do.  Protective orders need filing separately here.  I have an arichive of my aticles on our courts and an archive on protective orders.  I put in these links so that more specific information is can be gotten to, please use them to get at this information.

8. Consult with your tax advisor concerning the tax consequences of spousal support, allocation of the dependency exemption, exclusion of gain from sale of marital residence, etc.

Another good idea that applies here as well as Indiana.

9. Be careful about leaving the marital residence without a separation agreement.

I do not think this is as a lethal in Indiana as it appears to be for Virginians.   That any agreement is a good thing, I will not deny.

10. Consider the possibility in your agreement that one spouse may file for bankruptcy relief.

Always, always consider the fact of bankruptcy.   Maybe it is all my years when I did practice consumer bankrutpcy law but I am a bit surprised by lawyers who do not think of bankruptcy.

McLean County Divorce comes from Illinois lawyer, Jon D. McLaughlin, with me having a bit of concern over the two months from his last post.  However, Hoosiers still might learn from his Change of Child Custody and Simple Divorces (we have a better procedure here). I have some quibbles with his Suggestions for Fathers going through a divorce but on the whole, it is a good collection of suggestions for Indiana fathers.  Let us hope that Mr. Mclaughlin continues to publish his blog.

Okay, it is Canadian but Collaborative Practice Canada does a more than adequate job of promoting colllaborative law.  I cannot say that anything specifically applies to Indiana but that has is not quite the point either.  If the general public wants a less adversarial approach to family law cases, then the general public needs to know that an alternative not only exists but why it is preferable.  That said, give a look at Collaborative Law - in the interests of families and children..


 Another family law blog, this time from California's Orange County.  Hence the name being Orange County Family Lawyer Blog. It looks fairly new but the articles are clearly written and succinct.  Still fairly new and may interest those who want to contrast Indiana's courts with another state.

New Indiana Family Law Blog and Health Insurance After Divorce

I have been remiss about mentioning a new Indiana family law blog from the New Albany firm of Waters Tyler Scott Hofmann & Doane, LLC - simply named Divorce Law Indiana. I like the style of the blog and its content, and it is good to have another Indiana family law blog. Especially one from the southern part of the state (although I am now wondering why nothing out of Evansville?)

I especially wanted to point out this article,  Health insurance after divorce, which points out the reasons why I am following the health care reform bill with interest.

In general, when your marriage ends, there are four ways for you to get health insurance coverage:

1. Continue your health insurance temporarily through COBRA.

The Consolidated Omnibus Reconciliation Act of 1986 (COBRA) is a federal law designed to protect employees and their dependents from losing coverage as a result of job loss or divorce. If your former spouse maintained family health coverage through work (and works for a company with at least 20 employees), you may continue this group coverage for up to 36 months after the divorce or legal separation. You will have to pay for this coverage, however. COBRA coverage will terminate sooner than 36 months if you remarry or obtain coverage under another group health plan.

Because individual policies are often more expensive than group policies, COBRA coverage is certainly attractive. If you decide to exercise your COBRA rights, your cost of continuing coverage cannot exceed 102 percent of the employer's cost for the insurance. Additionally, you have the right to pay the premiums in monthly installments.

2. Ask for health insurance coverage as part of your divorce settlement.

When you are negotiating a divorce settlement, ask that your spouse be required to maintain health insurance coverage for you. This may not work if you can easily get health insurance coverage through your own employer. But if you're an older homemaker or self employed without access to employer-sponsored health coverage, you have a better chance of receiving this as part of your settlement. Otherwise, when the COBRA coverage terminates after 36 months, you may be denied health insurance if your health is poor (although federal law provides protections for certain pre-existing medical conditions).

3. Get coverage through your own employer.

If you work and your employer offers health insurance coverage, sign up for it. Unless your spouse is paying for your health insurance coverage as part of your divorce settlement, this is probably the least expensive way for you to get health insurance.

4. Purchase an individual health insurance policy.

I also must say, I think anyone who notes the twentieth anniversary of the War of the Roses will be providing interesting material.

Interesting Blogs and Websites: Lawlady's Divorce and Entrepeneur Blog

A mixed bag wtih this post.

I forget how I ran across Lawlady's Divorce and Entrepreneur Blog. What I found was a different style from any other divorce/family lawyer/law blog so far.

For me the posts were long (yes, for someone who has a tendency to go on at length this may seem incongruous) and pitched in a different style. They came across as more letters to readers than articles. To me it seems to work, but that may be a bit of admiration undercutting my judgment.  I know I cannot write like than any more than I can write like Ernest Hemingway.  Along with the style comes some serious content.  Here is an example:

 Letter to Divorcing Client: Power Woman Facing Legal Nightmares

No matter what way you decide to handle things (and there are many). The most critical point is to wake up to the cold water of life being splashed in your face and say to yourself, "OK, I'm going to pick up the pace, clear the cobwebs out of my head, and put 100% into making this situation turn out alright." There are many role models and sources of support. But if you look to someone else to provide the necessary adrenaline and fight, you lose something in the process. You lose the ability to know for certain that you gave it all you have. And, really, the best outcome is the one that happens when you are fully prepared to do what it takes (even if that is to look your own fears and make peace with your fearful self). No one cares more than you about your life. Thus, your vote and intention and time and attention matter the most.

I keep learning of sites and organizations that relate to family law of which I never had a clue.  My explanation is that they just are not geared towards lawyers but towards clients.  The National Association of Divorce for Women and Children and WeParent.com are the latest examples of this type of site.  I do encourage anyone who is involved in the family law system to check out these sites.  The more you know the better off you will be.  At least, that is my opinion.

I also ran across two more attorney blogs that might be of interest.  At least I found them interesting.  The Australian Divorce Blog and THE OREGON DIVORCE BLOG I find interesting for the simple reason that I find it cool to see what is going on elsewhere. Writing this blog is as much about my education as yours. Seeing what is done elsehwhere - whether Oregon or Australia - has made me look at the whole of the system we call family law and not just the parts (which is the common state for lawyers and judges).

Something quite different is The Psycho Ex Wife which describes itself this way:

The Psycho Ex Wife is the true account of a marriage, divorce, and subsequent custody fight between a loving man, his terroristic ex-wife who we suspect suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (at least from our armchair psychologist diagnosis), and the husband's new partner. We are not simply anti-mother or pro-father.

I think this is the first blog I have seen that diaries the parties experiences during a family law case.  Which makes me wonder how long before we see more. Lawyers, we might want to keep an eye on this to gtet more insights into our clients/the general public.  Again, that is just my opinion.

New Indiana Family Law Blog: All Things Family Law

I only became aware of All Things Family Law out of Indianapolis on Monday.  So far, I like what I see - and I am a bit envious.  The writer's tone has a good deal more jauntiness to it than I have been able to manage.  Welcome All Things Family Law to the Indiana legal blogosphere!

New Indiana Family Law Blog

I probably should feel a bit remiss about not noticing JOCHAM HARDEN DIMICK JACKSON's JOCHAM HARDEN DIMICK JACKSON.  It is part of their website but I do not recall seeing it otherwise.

Rather bare bones, with no outgoing links, and about a post a month, it is still good to see another family law blog in the area.  It might help a bit, too, to give it some personality.

Blog for International Custody/Hague Convention Issues

Several weeks back someone contacted me about a post I had written (News: Non-compliant Hague Countries Report ). I had to explain to her that my practice does not really involve Hague Convention matters. However, I did refer her to the International Family Law Blog (which you will find in my family law links on the right hand side of your screen and down). This is the blog to refer to for Hague Convention news, IMHO.

English Cohabitiation Bills Fails

I guess this is International Day for this blog. Head of Legal is an English blog. Its Baroness Deech and the Cohabitation Bill details a bit too much for my American comprehension about the politics of the is particular Bill. Why I want to mention the post here is for the discussion in the comments about the general merits of a cohabitation bill. I expect a similar debate here between those suggest such a bill is too much state intervention and the inequity of the law towards people's property who are unmarried. If such a debate comes here, I will come down on the side of the second of debate.


(Note to any American readers, especially lawyers, I suggest subscribing to John Bolch's Family Lore and reading CharonPC).

New Ohio Law Bog

A shout out to Ohio Law Blog which has a large number of family law posts. I am finding it very interesting to see some of the similarities and differences between Indiana and Ohio. (I do like the layout and style, the way.)

Coparenting - Check this out

While checking out some new family law blogs, I ran across New Hampshire Family Law Blog. There I ran across Coparenting your children which caught my attention.

One of the most important things that parents in separate households can do for their children is cooperatively co-parent. Successfully co-parenting allows both parents to be involved in a child's day to day life. I recently came across a useful article published by the University of New Hampshire Cooperative Extension titled "Co-parenting after Divorce."

Frankly, this is not a term I have seen before and now I wonder why not. I could not get thee link to the original article working, but that might be fixed now. I suggest you do think about the following:

Additionally, consider the road that you and the other parent do not want to go down. One of the most important aspects of co-parenting is keeping the children out of the middle. The article points out that:

Problems may develop if parents send messages to each other through their children. Problems also arise when a parent talks negatively about the other parent. Children may feel guilty and unsure of their parents’ love when they’re caught in the middle.

If a parent asks about a former spouse, children may report that things are fine, even if they’re not. Or children may say things to make one of the parents feel bad. Again, don’t use your children by putting them in the middle. If you want to know something about your ex-spouse, ask that person yourself.

Explore these behaviors that you and the other parent agree you will both avoid, and work any agreements into the parenting plan as well.

Remember, if you want more information about retaining me for a case, please give me a call at 765-641-7906.

Mediation - Should It Be Mandatory?

I overheard a conversation today that there is a push to move all family law cases into some form of alternative dispute resolution. I can think of several reasons against this idea starting with cost and continuing through the idea that we pay judges to do this job.

Meanwhile, I learned of a new family law blog, Massachusetts Divorce Law Monitor, and one post stood out: Mediation

In my last post I mentioned the Family Service Office of the Probate Court. That is the department which is tasked with getting litigants to settle their cases. Most cases do settle, which is a good thing as the system would otherwise be totally overwhelmed. It is also a good thing for the parties, as an agreement in which you have had some say is generally better than one which is imposed on you.

Resolution of a divorce or other family law matter without extensive litigation in the court is possible. Mediation is a voluntary process that invites people to come to agreement through informed negotiation with the assistance of a neutral third party. Mediation gives the parties the opportunity to discuss the issues between them (be it division of property, custody of children, alimony, child support or any number of other family law matters), clear up misunderstandings, determine their underlying interests or concerns, find areas of agreement and, ultimately, to reduce their agreement to a written settlement document. Mediation is particularly useful in the divorce and family law arena, as it provides spouses with control at a time when their lives might otherwise feel out of control.

Right now, I am only aware of one county that requires mediation - Marion.

So, what does everyone think of making mediation mandatory?

Remember, if you want more information about retaining me for a case, please give me a call at 765-641-7906.

Newer Blog: Atlanta Divorce Attorney Blog

I ran across Atlanta Divorce Attorney Blog at the end of 2008. Good looking blog with good writing but it does focus very much on Georgia law. I find it interesting to note the similarities and the difference. For example, Adultery’s effect on a divorce case in Georgia shows that adultery has the same effect there as here except we do not have alimony:

Alimony also comes into play in equitable distribution. Generally, equitable distribution results in splitting the marital estate 50/50, unless there is a reason to give one spouse a greater portion of the marital estate. One reason to give one spouse a disproportionate amount of the marital estate is the bad conduct of the other party, which can include adultery. If an adulterous spouse committed egregious adultery in the presence of the other spouse and/or children, this conduct may result in an unequal split of the marital estate. Similarly, if the adulterous spouse spent substantial marital funds on his or her paramour, the other spouse could get a disproportionate amount of the marital estate to make up the difference and even punish the adulterous spouse.

Remember, if you want more information about retaining me for a case, please give me a call at 765-641-7906.

Yet Another English Family Law Blog

But I likke the idea of demystifying the legal process and want to give Divorce Manual a shout out. I think most of us blogging aobut family law do want to demystify the process (even if it may come about by our griping) but maybe we need something as definite as Divorce Manual here.

Think About It: What Goes into a Prenuptial or Cohabitation Agreement

Deborah Moskovitch has written a book on divorce and is blogging on divorces with her The Smart Divorce® Weblog.

Her The thinking behind a prenuptial or co-habitation agreement beigns with:

"I am currently researching a book entitled Get It Right This Time and Move On: The Conversation You Need to Have. This is a revolutionary book covering the number of issues facing people going through not only another divorce, but offers ways to assess another significant relationship. It also guides people on their way to a smart relationship the next time, and moving on with the rest of their lives intact. While researching this book, I found that there seems to be a clear consensus on the importance of prenuptial/co-habitation and cohabitation agreements which need to be included in the mix."

I cannot disagree with either the sentiments or opinions of this paragraph (just click the link below to see my archives on cohabitation, post-nuptial or prenuptial agreements and you will see repeat both the sentiments and opinions in this paragraph):

Both type of agreements – prenuptial and cohabitation - are on the rise. Despite this increase, many family law lawyers feel that not enough of their clients are requesting these agreements. On the client side, there needs to be greater education about what these agreements are for. Furthermore, people are afraid to discuss their thoughts behind these agreements with a potential partner as a result of potential conflict and/or undermining their relationship.

Summing up, she makes this point which I think everyone emphasizes as why a prenuptial, post-nuptial or cohabitation is a good idea:

Considerations:

Prenuptial co-habitation agreements are an excellent way to protect assets in the event of separation/divorce. However, the important conversations a couple needs to have when agreeing to craft the agreement could actually go a long way to ensuring they are on the same page and hopefully avoid the all out war, which too often results.

I do suggest checking out The Smart Divorce® Weblog. Although Deborah Moskovitch is not a lawyer. This might get more of you paying attention to this idea of getting an agreement.

The New Jersey Family Law Blog

I want to recommend the The New Jersey Family Law Blog. Good design, good writing, and, for my Hoosier readers, the contrast to how some states are different are from Indiana. Such as the subject of alimony.

A Compliment from NonCustodial Parent Community Blog

I noticed yesterday that NonCustodial Parent Community Blog linked to my Enforcing Visitation Rights/Parenting Time and had a few good things to say about my post. I have not had time to thoroughly check out the NonCustodial Parent Community Blog, but I do like what I have seen. Noncustodial parents should check this out.

New family law blog

Palm Beach County Family Law Blog is a recent find and an interesting one. Of course, interesting is a slippery concept. I find all too often that blogs become too interwined in their posts to point of becoming a round-robin of saying the same thing. So, for me, interesting means those that present a different viewpoint or a subject that I have not seen before.

For example, this Palm Beach blog has Divorce Cakes, A Sweet Ending To A Disagreeable Process. I have suggested to more than one client that they go and have a party after the Final Hearing. I think several have taken me up on the idea. This post shows someone is taking my idea even further.